My 600 pound Possible Life

I've been watching episodes of TLC's My 600 Pound Life.  My family doesn't understand my fascination with this show.  In some ways, it feels like "going to a meeting." It's a reality check for me because in my family, this is not just extreme television, it's actually possible.  I look to see how their bodies store fat differently when it has no where else to go.  I observe the pain they feel with ordinary movement--how they swing their body around because they can't actually lift their leg or brush the back of their hair.  They stop doing self-care like trimming their toe nails or buying new shoes as they shuffle from point A to point B.  Many have given up on shoes and just wear non-skid socks that don't protect them from dirt or water, but then they never go outside or venture far from their comfort zone.  I listen to their excuses and hear myself in them.  Then I remind myself that if I continue to make those excuses, this is the inevitable end to the road I'm on.

I stayed in my calorie budget today, but my food choices weren't excellent.  My version of a cheat day, I guess.  I felt triumphant about getting Brian and Jacob to go to the pool with me.  I got my 40 minutes of exercise in.  That felt good.  It wasn't hard to get out of the pool today. That felt even better.